About My Life As A Scooter

Ramblings from the mind of a scooter.  Yes this is a blog written for scooters, from the point of view of a Scooter.

My Life As A Scooter

Ramblings from the mind of a scooter. Yes this is a blog written for scooters, from the point of view of a Scooter.

November 2007 - Posts

  • Flaming.....

    Flaming has reared its head a bit in recent weeks on the forum, thanks to some interesting characters from across the sea..... (And before you ask how a scooter is able to log onto the internet and read stuff and subsequently post these messages - well duh...I'm a scooter, i can't - I need someone to do it for me.....)

    Now where was I.....We've had an assortment of interesting international visitors recently, each slightly more misguided and left of the middle than the last......but we welcome all scooter enthusiasts... as the plaque on the Statue of Liberty says...."Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free.....but your dutch Zulu riders, dont send them to me!!!......" (Anthony isn't sure that's exactly what it says......perhaps its a translation issue....)

    So anyway, this weeks flaming made me want to show off my new flames that adorn my panels......

    i got them from on Ebay...

    I haven't been out much this week, Anthony has been working a lot and hasn't had time to take me for a spin, but I'm sure that come Sunday afternoon, we'll be out cruising as we always do.

    so i'm sorry that today's post wasn't real thrilling - it hasn't been a thrilling week, but things can only get better. So I bid you farewell for yet another week,

    stay safe, ride often and........i'm forgetting something aren't I......lets back-track a bit to make sure i haven't forgotten anything.....ok, so the usual format is......I say Hi, follow that by saying something mildly amusing, perhaps make fun of Anthony in some way, maybe show a photo of something scooter related, what else is there........oh, that's could I forget (drumroll please....)

    Monaco's Celebrity Pillion Passenger of The Week - This weeks winner used to hang out with 5 people having a party?, she knows what you did last summer, she whispers to ghosts and has jokingly referred to parts of her anatomy as Thelma & Louise.....please say hello to the lovely Jennifer Love Hewitt

  • My Day on the Ute......

    The weekend began with our normal Friday afternoon ride, we headed up the coast, rode around for a while, topped up the tank with fuel and headed home – one sleep away from the track night.


    Saturday morning started quietly for me…(for Anthony it wasn’t so easy) firstly he cycled 18km to Coolangatta Airport….yes he had to leave his normal motorised two-wheeled transport behind (that would be me…) and pedal in the heat to get the ute.  He made some comments about the heat, and how his legs were tired….(I basically switch off when he starts bitching……)


    So he arrived back about 90 minutes later, with the ute that was to be my form of transportation for our trip to Willowbank.


    So the next step was to load me onto the ute……it seemed like a simple task, my only request was…. DON’T DROP ME!  So after finding an old door that was to be used as a ramp, he started me up and slowly pushed me up the ramp….which worked until I started to spin my back wheel on the slippery paint, thankfully a neighbour heard the spinning wheel and came to help push….problem solved, I was on the ute, strapped down and ready to go.  (Anthony is laughing at something again....he's got something wrong with him....apparently he and someone else will get the joke.....)


    We were soon on our way up to Southport to meet up with the others.   Because it was early in the day, I was destined to sit on the back of that ute for a while…..So there I was, in the sun, strapped to a metal tray…for a couple of hours……baking like a Christmas turkey….


    But I knew it would be worth it….I knew that in a few hours I’d be let loose and once again experience the thrill of going hard around the track.


    So eventually business was done for the day at ScooterHQ, and the other ute was packed up and ready to go….We made our way out to the highway and just before we made it to the highway….we stopped….we waited…..then the engine was switched off and Brendon walked over to deliver the bad news…..the bad weather that had been hitting the Ipswich area, had continued most of the day and it had been decided to cancel the track night before it began.


    So it was time to turn around…….....Apparently I wasn’t forgotten about, it’s just that I’m a scooter and can’t drink beer and play pool, so I was left out on the street for a few hours, on the ute, and then we drove home.  And apparently I hadn't yet had quite enough time on the ute so I spent the night there and was unloaded Sunday morning.


    But the weekend wasn’t totally without riding, we did go for a blast out through the twisties for a while and judging by the look of the tyres when we got back there were some cool lean angles happening into the corners.


    So that’s my weekend…..and now its time for the announcement of Monaco’s Celebrity Pillion Passenger of The Week…..and this week’s winner goes out to Brendon from ScooterHQ…..give it up for Jessica Alba.

  • I Don't Understand Humans....

    The topic of this week’s blog post is self-explanatory.  I don’t understand human beings, or human behaviour…


    Classic example was Sunday afternoon.  There we were out for a ride, there was a bit of traffic around but nothing that was going to upset our Sunday cruise…or so I thought.


    There was a car that had been driving beside us in the right lane, just behind us, and as we approached a set of traffic lights, the driver of this car decided to overtake and then change lanes right in front of us, causing the brakes to come on hard, and causing an outburst from Anthony.


    Sure I wasn’t happy that this guy had cut us off  (Anthony later informed me that this guy was doomed from the start as he was an elderly gentleman, wearing a hat and driving a Toyota Camry)…but anyway - he cut us off, and I thought…”that wasn’t a very smart thing to do” and for me that was it...


    But for Anthony, he took it personally and decided to verbalise his frustration (first politely, gesturing towards the car asking “what do you think you are doing…”) but then as he overtook the car he decided to less-than-politely tell the driver what he thought about his driving style.


    And this is where I got confused….somehow Anthony knew a lot about this stranger in the Camry… Firstly he made references to the guy’s mother, who was possibly in the Trucking industry (or something that sounded like that….) all I could understand from his ranting was that either the driver (or perhaps his mother) was an idiot…….but how he knew about her ability to drive heavy transport…..?? Don’t know….


    As I’ve said…..HUMANS  = MYSTERY.  It's yet another thing to ponder down here in the garage. 


    But despite the unpleasantness of the early part of the ride, the rest was great.


    And so I conclude this weeks post with the one thing that I do understand about humans, and that is which one I’d like to have as Monaco’s Celebrity Pillion Passenger of The Week.   And so continuing the theme (yes Allen, you may be right…)  This weeks winner is Brunette, British, Beautiful and would be perfect on the scooter as she looks good in black leather… Please welcome the lovely Kate Beckinsale


  • Anthony.....WE HAVE A PROBLEM......

    Today is Friday – which means its “Friday Afternoon Ride day” doesn’t mean anything else......(or so I thought......) So imagine you are me, you are cruising down the road, out onto the highway, open up the throttle, up onto the bridge over the river when suddenly.....there’s a noise, followed by no drive and then normal engine sound stops and is replaced by a strange flapping type sound........NOT GOOD! So after turning me around and heading down off the bridge onto the side of the road Anthony made a phone call to ScooterHQ for some assistance – and after a short diagnosis it is confirmed that yes the belt has snapped – (ironically this is the belt that was due to be replaced in the morning.) BIG HUGE THANKS to D’arcy for coming down tomorrow to fix me....thankfully due to Daylight saving you were still open and able to take the call for assistance – what would we do without you guys.....!! Sure it initially seemed like crap luck that we had to walk back home, but things could have been worse and we could have been on the other side of the bridge, and down the hill when it snapped.......leading to even more disappointment...... Thinking back to my earlier blog post today, perhaps I could have made comment on a recent forum thread regarding adding scooters to NRMA (or similar) membership.....(something a certain person is going to do asap.....) but instead I chose to make comment on bogan motorists – and it was not surprising that during our 6 km walk, it was the bogans, and bogan p-platers, (in their half complete undercoat-grey or matte black @#$%-boxes) who thought it would be funny to yell abuse as they screamed past. (Anthony would like to add his thanks to the dude in the silver falcon who stopped to offer us fuel – it was a very kind gesture, but unless you can make fuel solid and into the shape of a drive belt, you can’t help. But thanks for the offer.......and to the other hundred or so motorists who didn't stop.......we'll just leave it there i think......) Anyway, we live and learn...... (Anthony would like to add that we Live, WE PUSH....and then we learn!!!) And so I bid you all goodnight........see you all on the black stuff......I'm a bit tired... Monaco.
  • Cletus The Slack Jawed Commodore driver…

    One topic that has been discussed on the forum recently concerns scooter riders getting hassled by neanderthals in black cars….you all know the type…They are the ones who use more fuel in their race to the next set of lights than a scooter does in a week. So there we were, out for a ride, when suddenly the right hand lane was occupied by a car load of flannel-clad dudes whose parents had possibly spent too much time swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool…

    They raced up and tried to unsettle us (....polite way of saying they tried to scare the #@$% out of Anthony)…….my first reaction was “yes boys, I remember my first drink too…” and after getting all fired up, thought it might be fun to take them on at the next set of lights…….Anthony seemed less keen and decided to hang back (leaving a space large enough for almost two cars in front of us).

    Cletus, who had made the original introduction, once again stuck his head out of the passenger side window and babbled another beer-fuelled sentence of incoherentness (is that a word? Screw it, this is my blog – It’s a word now!) And then after the lights went green, the lads filled the atmosphere with more excess greenhouse emissions, and then we rode past them (unfortunately I wasn’t able to give them the bird, and Anthony is smart enough not too, and has decided that he likes his face the way it is)

    Fortunately they seemed to lose interest when we didn’t respond, and then took a right at the next set of lights and were gone.

    And so the point of my rambling today is…..what is up with people in cars who seem to think we (Scooters) are a joke. Is it jealousy? Is it ignorance? Or is it just good old human stupidity…..anyway, its another thing for me to ponder as I spend my time in the garage.

    Scooters are far simpler creatures. And being lower down the food chain (with respect to size on the road) all we really have to make fun of are bicycles and their lycra clad riders and perhaps old people in mobility scooters (they are a totally unique breed – and let me just say that you haven’t lived until you’ve seen Mobility Scooter Rage…but that’s another disturbing story for another time.)

    And now all that is left is the announcement of Monaco’s Celebrity Scooter Pillion Passenger of the Week.

    This week’s winner is a star of the Best Movie Ever Made….(and I must say that Ricky Bobby was wrong, best movie ever made is not Highlander, it’s Transformers)……and so this weeks celebrity passenger is Megan Fox.



  • He Went, He Saw, He Sat..........and yes it did look good!

    Hi folks....yes the mythical creature known as the Derbi does exist and has been found - and after our hunting expedition a few weeks ago, as you all now know - the beast was proudly unveiled at ScooterHQ late last week and Anthony got to sit on it, look at it, take photos etc.....and yes, from my "back of the workshop" parking spot, it did look impressive.  


    Thankfully for me, you humans require money to get things, and to obtain a Derbi; he requires more than he has, so I'm safe for now!! :)

    So what else has been happening in the life of Monaco the scooter?   Well, after our ride to ScooterHQ on saturday we did some more riding over the weekend, he caught up with a friend with a blue TGB R50X and went in search of some roads, and basically we just cruised around in the sunshine enjoying the fabulous weather that southern QLD has to offer.  The only problem was the abundance of butterflies - many of them ended up as a yellow splat on my panels, (....and anthony's jacket and helmet.......oh, and there was the one that hit him on his sunnies when he had his visor up to get some fresh air....)

    Being a scooter is a great thing.  You get plenty of time outdoors, you get treated like you are something special, you get admired and smiled at by people on the road (sure some are laughing but they are ultimately the ones that get stuck in traffic in the heat, spend a fortune on running costs and don't enjoy their driving experience - they get what's coming to them!)

    Other than that, it's been a quiet week.  We haven't been out on the road since sunday, but i'm hoping that this afternoon we'll get a chance for a ride. 

     And so I leave you for another week, and to all the other scooters out there - enjoy your time on the road, enjoy your time out in the sun, enjoy being an economical and environmentally friendly form of transport, but most of all - ENJOY BEING A SCOOTER!

    Until next time,



    PS -  During my time in the garage this week, I was thinking to myself - Who would I like to have as a passenger on my seat?     and the winner of Monaco's Celebrity Scooter Pillion Passenger Of The Week is..........Liv Tyler